Ladies 18 Holers to Host Golf Tournament at Seascape Golf Club

Brenda Holquin, Ladies 18 Holers - Seascape Golf Club

Each year, the Women's 18 Hole Golf Club from Seascape hosts a charity tournament.  For the last 13 years, the club has chosen  Hospice of Santa Cruz County as their beneficiary.  According to Brenda Holquin, Captain of the club, they choose HSCC “because we all need it in life and it has been utilized by a lot of our members.”  Brenda has been a member of the Women’s 18 Hole Golf Club for five years and an employee at Seascape Golf Club for seven years, working in the pro shop and doing the books on the weekends.  The club was formed over 50 years ago to promote the sport of golf among its members and to conduct tournaments and activities. Over 40 women are members of the club.  Last year they presented HSCC with over $5,200 from the tournament.

The sold out tournament will take place on July 23rd and 80 members & non-members are registered.  “It sold out immediately,” Brenda shared.  “HSCC is really supported by the community.  It's one of the charities that it's unbelievably easy to get support for because of the services hospice provides .”  The Women’s 18 Holers are grateful to Seascape Golf Club for allowing the club to host the tournament at their course and Hospice of Santa Cruz County is grateful to Seascape Golf Club and its members for their support and generosity.

For more information about Seascape Golf Club membership, contact General Manager, Gary Nelson at  (831) 688-3213 or visit www.seascapegc.com or their Facebook Page.

Santa Cruz County: More Medicare patients choose hospice at end of life than anywhere else in the Bay Area

By Linda Donovan, Grief Support Volunteer - Hospice of Santa Cruz County

I was very impressed, but not surprised when I read the excellent article in the San Jose Mercury News, The Cost of Dying: A shift in how we end our lives. This article highlighted how more Medicare patients are choosing hospice over hospitals at the end of life. It referenced research that said 70 percent of Californians would rather die at home and 67 percent said it was extremely important to not burden families with care costs. The article discussed the value of “shifting patients to hospice and family homes where caregivers try to ease the discomforts of dying.”

Santa Cruz County was highlighted for having 53.1 percent of Medicare patients choose hospice at end of life in 2010 —the highest proportion of patients selecting hospice in the Bay Area. That was about 10% higher for Santa Cruz than in 2007. In fact, Santa Cruz is one of the few areas where’ out of pocket costs for these people declined. Why didn’t any of this news surprise me? Because my family used Hospice of Santa Cruz County services when my late husband was terminally ill and I’ve been actively involved as grief support volunteer for hospice since 2008. I’ve seen, experienced, and shared the gift that this hospice provides to people with compassionate care at the end of life.

The article mentioned that Santa Cruz stands out for its low-intensity, high-touch standard of care. It attributes Santa Cruz County’s success to the tight bond among doctors, hospitals, and civic groups and referenced the value of Hospice of Santa Cruz County: “Additionally, its leading hospice has existed for 35 years, cultivating trust.”

Michael Milward, CEO of Hospice of Santa Cruz County, said in the article, “We have a remarkably collaborative community that is able to meet each other at the edges, having tough conversations that involve high-quality, low-cost and practical solutions.” According to Milward, by having these conversations, hospice knows who can offer the best service to people at the end of life, as well to their families.

What does this best service look like when people choose Hospice of Santa Cruz County? It includes an array of qualified people, resources, and services available to meet the many needs of seriously ill individuals and their family. When you or your family selects this hospice, a whole team is assigned to help. The social worker identifies needs and concerns    and helps guide the individual and family through this difficult time. Nurses visit regularly and can be available at 24 /7 with just a phone call. It’s like the old days of when doctors routinely made house calls instead of sick people having to wait in an office lobby for medical treatment. Medications and medical equipment are delivered to the home. A chaplain is available to provide spiritual guidance. Volunteer visitors offer much-needed support to everyone involved with caring for their loved one.  Hospice even offers   transitional care services to support people who are not yet ready for hospice care and need help with clarifying their healthcare decisions and identifying other community resources.

Grief support is a critical service provided by Hospice of Santa Cruz County. Resources are available to help the family while they are caring for their loved one. After the loss, people in the community can attend one-on-one grief support sessions, scheduled grief groups, or specialized programs, such one focused on the needs of children. These services help prepare people as they adjust to their lives after the loss. In addition, grief support services are not only for hospice families — they are also available to the entire community.

Hospice of Santa Cruz County continues to make a difference in the lives of so many people. Just recently, hospice broadened its reach by opening a Center for End of Life Care in Watsonville. I’ve seen and experienced the depth of compassionate care by hospice. Having it recognized in the San Jose Mercury News article validates the commitment and service of this amazing non-profit organization.

The Physical Effect of Caregiving

About two-thirds of all family caregivers are women. It’s these tender souls who give up much in order to take care of those they love who are on their final journey in life. It’s also these gentle souls, and maybe you are one of them, who tend to put all their energy into taking care of everyone else and fail to take care of their own physical needs.

Let’s look at some statistics:

-  Female caregivers experience higher levels of depression and anxiety and also a lower level of general wellbeing than their male counterparts.

-  Twenty-two percent of female caregivers go to bed exhausted.

-  More than 1 in 5 women fail to get their regular mammograms on time.

-  Due to increased stress, 21 percent of all caregivers have a higher abuse level of alcohol and prescription drugs.

-  Female caregivers are more likely to smoke or consume fatty foods.

-  Female caregivers don’t fill their prescriptions on time and don’t go to the doctor as often as they should.

-  Female caregivers are more susceptible to heart disease and they don’t eat well or exercise regularly.

All of this neglect of their own physical needs often leads to higher mortality rates in women family caregivers; especially if they are over 65 and caring for a loved one.

So what is the message you should take from all this information? Well, it’s multi-layered.

Start by realizing that you are abusing yourself by neglecting your own physical needs. You can always say, “I just don’t have time for all those things.” Find a way to make time for yourself without feeling guilty.

Set goals and follow through with them. This might be a simple as saying “I will do one thing every day to take care of me.” That one thing might be a half hour walk, keeping a doctor’s appointment, shopping with a friend or going to your son’s baseball game. You will be happier and your quality of care will be better.

GET HELP!  Honestly, please get help. You must realize that it is possible that you can’t be all things to everybody. Call on family. Call on a friend. Get help from Hospice of Santa Cruz County, hospice can help support you as a family caregiver. Schedule a volunteer to come read to your loved one while you go to the doctor. Have a friend come over to visit the patient while you exercise for an hour. A family member might be willing to pick up your prescriptions if you don’t have time. You would be amazed at how many people are will and able to assist you.

It is important to you, the patient and your own family that you stay whole through this difficult time. That may take a little work on your part to coordinate and schedule with others, but it is well worth it if it means you maintain your physical and mental health.

“Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure.” – Tao Tzu

Communication is Key to Being a Good Caregiver

 If you are the primary caregiver for your loved one, you might not be thinking about how communicating effectively might benefit your loved one or your ability to care for them well. However, as primary caregiver, you are the focal point for which all communications are channeled. Some of those conversations will need to be relayed to others involved in your loved one’s care such as a physician, a spiritual counselor, the hospice team and maybe family and friends who are also providing support. How effectively you communicate can make a difference in the quality of care your loved one receives.

Even if you have a close relationship with the person you are caring for, these discussions can be difficult and emotionally charged. Try a few of these suggestions and see if they help:

  - Calm yourself before beginning a discussion. Breathe deeply and settle yourself into a peaceful place before beginning. Your loved one will be able to sense if you are tense and upset. Remember to focus on what is best for your loved one. It might help to think of yourself in their position.

  - Really listen to what they have to say. Resist the urge to interrupt with thoughts of your own. Allow the person some silent time to think and to take time to form a response. Take it slow.

  - Use body language to communicate more effectively. Look your loved in the eye. Hold their hand or put your hand on their arm. Touch is an important part of communicating deeply.

   - Avoid trying to do other things while communicating. This can be distracting and you might miss something important. Also, it makes it look like you aren’t totally focused on what your loved one is trying to convey to you. This might damage trust in the long run.

         - Pay attention to details. Does their behavior match what they are saying? They might feel awkward or scared about saying what is really going on. They may be afraid of losing more and more independence. Make sure to double check gently with them if something doesn’t sound right. Assure them that you are there to do your very best for them.

           - Avoid arguing, as it will only lead to more tension and loss of trust. Use humor to dispel stress filled times. Laughter is a great way to make everyone more comfortable.

     - Write things down if you need to. Your next step will be to communicate things to others on the caregiving team and you want to make sure you don’t forget anything. Use a Caregiver’s Notebook to record good notes.

The next step in communicating is to talk to other caregivers. Hopefully you have recognized that you are not the only one who can care for your loved one and you have a whole team of caring people willing and able to assist with patient care, running errands, organizing food and giving you a break.

Provide clear, accurate and consistent information to all caregivers involved.

Find a way to communicate with all caregivers in a timely fashion. Consider setting up a Facebook or email group in order to keep everyone current. This is especially a good idea when communicating with family and friends who are out of town. You can share video and pictures as well.

Clear, honest, timely communications will make you an excellent support person for that dear person you are caring for.

Care for Caregivers, Know Your Limits

As with any difficult period you go through in life, caring for a seriously ill loved one is a job you might gladly accept, but the impact on your physical and mental health and your relationship with your family, can be severe. The National Alliance of Caregivers has done extensive research on the subject:

“Nearly three quarters (72%) of family caregivers report not going to the doctor as often as they should and 55% say they skip doctor appointments for themselves.

63% of caregivers report having poor eating habits than non-caregivers and 58% indicate worse exercise habits than before caregiving responsibilities.

20% of employed female caregivers over 50 years old report symptoms of depression compared to 8% of their non-caregiving peers.”

By making you aware of these statistics, we hope you will take a few moments to reflect on just how important taking care of yourself is to the process of providing outstanding support to your loved one who needs you now.

Becoming a caregiver may or may not have been a conscious decision. You may be gladly caring for your spouse or partner out of love and dedication. You feel it is your choice and duty to them and you would not want to be anywhere else during this time.

On the other hand, maybe you are the only child living close to your parent who is facing the end of life. You may be feeling the weight of the responsibility that has become yours. Either way, the path you are on can be  a lonely and difficult one, so you should make a conscious effort to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally.

The real challenge is to know yourself and your limitations in order to take care of yourself. This precious time you have to spend with your loved one will be richer if you are healthy and whole.

Here are some ideas for doing just that. We hope some of them will spark your interest and provide you with avenues for caring for yourself in addition to your loved one.

First and foremost, give yourself and your loved one the best outside help and support you can find. You may feel like you have to do this all alone. That is a common misconception. You are most certainly not alone. Hospices, like Hospice of Santa Cruz County can provide a wide range of options for you and your loved one to choose from. A hospice nurse  will help develop a plan with you that is just right for your situation.

Educate your self about your loved one’s disease. The more you know, the less fearful it will seem and you will be better equipped to help your loved one if you understand what’s going on. Check out information from the library, online information sources and ask the doctor or your hospice team any questions about things you don’t understand.

Keep a Caregiver’s Notebook. Use it for record keeping or writing down those questions that come up so you don’t forget to ask them later. You can record when medications need to be taken by the patient or changes you notice.  The notebook can also include a calendar to keep track of your own appointments so you don’t miss medical appointments, exercise classes, group support meetings or therapy sessions.

On that calendar, make sure you schedule caregiver breaks, which can be provided by one of your hospice team members or family and friends. If you strive to follow your caregiver’s calendar, you will keep yourself healthier and be the best caregiver you can be.

The little things CAN make a difference; things like eating right, exercising, expressing yourself by writing or through art. Watch movies you like with your loved one and invite other family members or friends so you have others around you. If you love books, read them aloud or get books on CD. Your loved one will enjoy them and so will you.

Attend a support group. Emotional health is just as important as physical health. There are many organizations in your community willing to assist with emotional support. Your hospice team members can help you find them. If you don’t feel comfortable in a group setting, try one-on-one counseling through your church or a therapist.

Remember to follow the Cardinal Rule of Caregiving: Take care of yourself so you CAN take care of your loved one.

Home Safety - Lighting The Way

This is part three in our four part series on creating a safe environment for an aging love one. When it comes to safety in the home, prevention really is the best medicine. Elder-proofing will help your loved one maintain a sense of independence affording you the peace of mind that comes with knowing you’ve provided every safeguard for their wellbeing.

 Lighting is important safety consideration. The correct lighting can go a long way in helping protect your loved one against falling and ensure they feel more comfortable in their home. Here’s a few simple steps to take:

Lighting the Way

- It is easier for elderly eyes to adjust if there are consistent lighting levels throughout the house, so consider using low-glare bulbs and shades.

- Nightlights are helpful to guide your parent along stairways as well as from the bedroom to the bathroom and kitchen.

- Light switches placed at both the top and bottom of stairs will ensure good visibility also ensure there are switches at both ends of long hallways.

- Install a light switch that can be reached from the bed to prevent your parent from fumbling in the dark if they awaken in the middle of the night.

- Illuminated light switches are much easier to locate in the dark, or you may choose a clap-on, clap-off lighting system.

- Make sure light switches are located near the entrance to rooms or consider adding automatic lighting where lights turn on when your loved one enters a room.

- Flashlights should be easily accessible in all rooms of the home, especially the bedroom.

Staying Safe Outdoors

 - Outside the home, make sure all walkways, paths, steps, decks, porches and entranceways have good lighting, solid traction and handrails for support.

-Exterior motion sensing floodlights will light your parent’s way and avoid the necessity of fumbling with keys in the dark.

There are many lighting products on the market today that are easy to install. By taking these simple steps your loved one’s home can remain a place of safety and comfort and you can retain peace of mind.

Home Safety, A Look At The Bathroom

This is part two in our four part series on creating a safe environment for an aging love one. Most people are familiar with the concept of childproofing a home when a new baby arrives. There are several steps you can take to “elder-proof” your home and ensure a safe and comfortable environment for your parents in their later years. One of the key rooms of concern is the bathroom. The bathroom can be the most dangerous room in the house, with slippery surfaces that are easy to fall on and sharp or hard corners where someone can hit their head. Making the bathroom safe is an important step in helping your aging loved one to maintain their independence.

Here’s a few simple steps:

- Add an elevated toilet seat with handgrips on both sides. Ensuring that the toilet tissue is within easy reach can ease the strain on an aging parent’s back and legs, thus reducing the risk of falling.

- Equip the tub with a  grab bars or a handrail placed at both sitting and standing levels. When using a bath chair or shower chair make sure that there are rubber grippers on the chair’s feet. Also make sure the chair is at the correct height so your loved one’s feet rest on the floor.

- If using a bedside commode, place it as close to the bed as possible.

- Use secure non-slip mats in the tub or shower, along with a wall-mounted liquid soap dispenser to keep your parent from having to bend down to retrieve a dropped bar of soap.

- Consider changing to hand-held shower devices. They are much easier to use when mobility is limited.

- If your parent does happen to slip in the tub, a shower curtain securely mounted into the wall will offer more support than a pressure-hung curtain that will pull away easily.

With the right bath safety cautions and aids in place, one of the most dangerous rooms in the house can become one of the safest.